How do I forgive and forget, love myself, and accept things as they are?
When I was in my twenties I hated everything... I hated my work, I hated my house, I hated the neighbourhood... I hated my life.
I would dream up ways of how I would have it different in the future, what I would do, where I would go and how I would raise my kids.
Then I discovered the single biggest secret that changed my life dramatically.
I was able to do the things that I wanted to do, live the life that I designed for myself and have the relationships in my life that I wanted to have.
The Lie About Building Trust
Most psychologists, friends, therapists and well-wishers will tell you to 'talk about it' and to 'let it all go' (what does that even mean...!!!) . They say that you should do this when you're angry or upset.
They say you need to get everything out in the open, get it off your chest, and learn to 'love yourself'. They say, the more you talk the better your relationship will be. Let your anger flow, let your hurt be out there and then it wont hurt you.
This is a losers game.
But the truth is when you go to therapy so many small things start popping up that you end up feeling worse... you might feel better in the moment in front of the therapist, but after you get home you end up feeling worse.
A few days later the anger and hurt pops back up again. And you're back to square one.
Most well-wishers say that you should talk about your feelings without understanding the truth about focus... which is this...
Whatever you focus on in your life will increase.
If you focus on the hurt in your life - that will increase.
If you focus on the pain that someone is causing you - that will increase.
Conversely, if you focus on love in your life - that will increase.
But that's easier said than done... right? So what can you do...
The only thing you can do is, change your own behaviour.
You can't change any thing else.
And if you try to change anything else... anyone else's behaviour, thoughts, or actions you will end up losing.
You will become frustrated, angry, and eventually you will give up on it.
So with that in mind let's look at
The Secret To Forgive The Hurtful People In Your Life
1. Write down everything that's hurting you in your life... thoughts about ex-girlfriends... memories of your friends... hurtful things your siblings said to you...
2. Collect anything you might find related to these memories - pictures, letters, phone numbers - any thing that you've written about her, about your friends, or events that hurt you in your diary, online, email, social media. Collect all of it.
3. Put all of this together in a metal trash can - do this outside your house.
4. Then light all the stuff on fire - (if you're afraid of fire, then just rip up the paper and throw all this in the trash)
5. When you're burning these past hurtful memories say out to your self, "Thank you for what you've taught me - I now release you to the universe!"
6. Delete all her pictures, phone number etc - and then say in your heart - "Thank you _____ (event's name) for everything you've taught me. I release you to the universe. Have a great life."
If you don't do this - you will keep focusing on her and the things she's doing and won't allow yourself to feel love from anyone else. You'll be stuck in a dangerous downward spiral in your life and wont be able to get out of this.
But by doing this you will release all the pent up energy inside you. Release the hurt inside you, so you can feel love in your life.
How To Love Yourself Even When You Hate Other People
Sit in a chair in a quiet room in your house and repeat to yourself, "I love you. You're the greatest miracle on this earth. You might have had a tough time so far. But I will protect you."
Do this for 5 minutes in the morning, and 5 minutes before you go to bed.
If you really want to super charge this, say this in front of a mirror with you looking into your own eyes.
In the beginning it will be difficult, but as you keep repeating this, it will become easier for you - and you will come to loving yourself.
Repeat this exercise for at least 31 days... longer if you want to. I do this every morning when I'm shaving and at night when I'm getting ready for bed.
This alone will help you realize how beautiful you really are. You will start loving yourself and will see your self worth in you.
SO go ahead and do this now. I know you are beautiful, and the greatest miracle in the world. I believe in you.
That's it, have a nice day :)
When I was in my twenties I hated everything... I hated my work, I hated my house, I hated the neighbourhood... I hated my life.
I would dream up ways of how I would have it different in the future, what I would do, where I would go and how I would raise my kids.
Then I discovered the single biggest secret that changed my life dramatically.
I was able to do the things that I wanted to do, live the life that I designed for myself and have the relationships in my life that I wanted to have.
The Lie About Building Trust
Most psychologists, friends, therapists and well-wishers will tell you to 'talk about it' and to 'let it all go' (what does that even mean...!!!) . They say that you should do this when you're angry or upset.
They say you need to get everything out in the open, get it off your chest, and learn to 'love yourself'. They say, the more you talk the better your relationship will be. Let your anger flow, let your hurt be out there and then it wont hurt you.
This is a losers game.
But the truth is when you go to therapy so many small things start popping up that you end up feeling worse... you might feel better in the moment in front of the therapist, but after you get home you end up feeling worse.
A few days later the anger and hurt pops back up again. And you're back to square one.
Most well-wishers say that you should talk about your feelings without understanding the truth about focus... which is this...
Whatever you focus on in your life will increase.
If you focus on the hurt in your life - that will increase.
If you focus on the pain that someone is causing you - that will increase.
Conversely, if you focus on love in your life - that will increase.
But that's easier said than done... right? So what can you do...
The only thing you can do is, change your own behaviour.
You can't change any thing else.
And if you try to change anything else... anyone else's behaviour, thoughts, or actions you will end up losing.
You will become frustrated, angry, and eventually you will give up on it.
So with that in mind let's look at
The Secret To Forgive The Hurtful People In Your Life
1. Write down everything that's hurting you in your life... thoughts about ex-girlfriends... memories of your friends... hurtful things your siblings said to you...
2. Collect anything you might find related to these memories - pictures, letters, phone numbers - any thing that you've written about her, about your friends, or events that hurt you in your diary, online, email, social media. Collect all of it.
3. Put all of this together in a metal trash can - do this outside your house.
4. Then light all the stuff on fire - (if you're afraid of fire, then just rip up the paper and throw all this in the trash)
5. When you're burning these past hurtful memories say out to your self, "Thank you for what you've taught me - I now release you to the universe!"
6. Delete all her pictures, phone number etc - and then say in your heart - "Thank you _____ (event's name) for everything you've taught me. I release you to the universe. Have a great life."
If you don't do this - you will keep focusing on her and the things she's doing and won't allow yourself to feel love from anyone else. You'll be stuck in a dangerous downward spiral in your life and wont be able to get out of this.
But by doing this you will release all the pent up energy inside you. Release the hurt inside you, so you can feel love in your life.
How To Love Yourself Even When You Hate Other People
Sit in a chair in a quiet room in your house and repeat to yourself, "I love you. You're the greatest miracle on this earth. You might have had a tough time so far. But I will protect you."
Do this for 5 minutes in the morning, and 5 minutes before you go to bed.
If you really want to super charge this, say this in front of a mirror with you looking into your own eyes.
In the beginning it will be difficult, but as you keep repeating this, it will become easier for you - and you will come to loving yourself.
Repeat this exercise for at least 31 days... longer if you want to. I do this every morning when I'm shaving and at night when I'm getting ready for bed.
This alone will help you realize how beautiful you really are. You will start loving yourself and will see your self worth in you.
SO go ahead and do this now. I know you are beautiful, and the greatest miracle in the world. I believe in you.
That's it, have a nice day :)
